Just some random thoughts

My days are filled with sadness and my nights sleepless. I wish life was easier but it always has to be so difficult. I know I should be used to it by now. I mean my life has always dished out the worst possible things to me. I wish I was able to get happiness in my life I try to be the best person I can. I try to be a caring and honest person and I try to do the right things in my life. I pray to God and hope to hear answers. I can never seem to get it right though. I don’t know why but it always seems to be that way. I wish life could be easier. My life has been completely turned upside down and torn apart over the past few recent months. I have found some happiness in this whole mess of a life but even in my happiness there is sadness for reasons I can’t disclose but it hurts so much. I want to be a happy person as I once was. I wish someone in this world could turn me in the right direction. I feel so lost and confused anymore. A few months ago my life hit a brick wall at 200 miles an hour, and it hasn’t been the same since. My children and a special lady have given me hope that something will change someday. Sometimes I wonder why God has to test me so much sometime I don’t think I can handle any more. I wish life was easier. But it isn’t so I just have to get through it. Sorry for the ramblings. But it is my minds thoughts….